I wasn’t expecting anything incredibly unusual from today’s church service. I haven’t had a Sunday off in months, and my work schedule has been kind of crazy of late, so I called off this morning to catch the sermon with a friend.
The man who spoke was not my pastor, but a Ugandan preacher who is here visiting with another brother who’s been helping him in Africa. And what he had to say was challenging. I felt personally effected by the service, not in the way that I normally am. It seemed as though God were trying to tell me to pack up and go, now, not to wait for next summer to begin my trip out west. I had been planning to work for a while longer, then start the drive in August of 2016. Yet in the past couple of years, every time I’ve planned on doing something a certain way or in a certain time, God has said no, and substituted my plans for His own. Today in church it was like He was asking me, “Why not go now?” Since starting back at work I’ve been stocking up on the supplies that I want for my trip; camera, lenses, clothing, backpack and bag. Just last night I ordered the boots I’ll be wearing while on the road, and the watch that will likely live on my wrist every day. The few hiking supplies I’ll want to bring, like a camp stove, sleeping bag and the like, I can borrow from my dad. I also just got this site up and running, which was really meant to be something I saved for my trip — but it’s ready now. And I’m not worried about money. If I were to leave “now,” that would mean I’d have a few weeks before I actually starting driving, while I wait for the last things to come in, and while I finished with work, so I’d likely hit the road with around a thousand to fifteen-hundred dollars. Honestly that’s plenty for what this trip is supposed to be — I don’t want to stay in any hotels, just with people I meet along the way. And even if I had no money, I know that God wants me to make this trip, and that He’ll provide for me along the way. The only question is, when?
So … why not now?
I’ve been thinking lately so much about making this trip, and dreading the wait. I want to start really living my life. But if this isn’t God’s timing, then I need to wait. I wish it were as easy as saying, “All right, God, when should I leave?” I wish it were easier to know His will on this.
But it isn’t. So I’m going to be fasting, and praying, and spending more time in the quiet. I took a walk around the neighbourhood this afternoon, to enjoy the solitude, and capture the colours of this beautiful time of year. I figured for my first entry on the new site I’d share my thoughts with you, as well as give you something pretty to look at.
Please be in prayer with me about this. I want God’s timing, or no one’s.
— Joel