Sitting here listening to music (currently the Gladiator score, by Hans Zimmer) and remembering just how many changes of plans there have been in my life in the last few years, in spite of the fact that I consider myself not at all inclined to make plans in the first place. So let’s recap a bit.
Sometime round about the spring or summer of 2015 I decided I wanted to make a trip to the west coast, probably just in my little car, probably just for a vacation. On October 31st of that same year, I decided I was going to make the trip by bicycle, and probably be gone at least a year; I decided to leave the beginning of summer the following year, 2016. On May 10th of 2016, as planned, I headed out on my bicycle. About a week later, I bought a Jeep in Minneapolis, then drove it home “to work on.” I ended up staying, because at the time there were things happening in my life which I considered more important than the trip. Fast forward a year, and I’m back at my old job, which I hate, spending ten to twelve hours a day washing dishes, and feeling all the time an increasing urge to be on the move — something I planned on doing in the spring of 2018, after I’d saved a lot more money and invested some ten thousand dollars into a Land Rover travel rig. (That, by the way, is something I still intend to do, someday.) Then work gets really really bad, and I walk out, not sure if I’m forfeiting my job, or if I intend on trying to return at all. I do end up coming back, but only after making the decision to begin my travels much sooner than planned. And so the Longing finally gets its hold fast, and I’m set.
After that I began preparing more; getting my gear together, deciding just what I actually wanted to bring along, what I needed to do to the Jeep before beginning, et cetera. Last weekend I built the frame that’s going into the back, which will serve as storage for everything that I’m bringing with me, and as my bed. Today my dad will be helping my put the top and bottom onto the frame, and fitting in a little something that I’ll be using for a project of mine while I travel. And travel I shall! The 27th of this month (July) is my last day of work, and on the 29th, myself and two friends are leaving for Maine. We’re taking Joey’s Jeep (a new Cherokee Trailhawk), as it’s much safer and more capable and comfortable than mine, and we’ll be gone through the following weekend. We’re planning on camping through most of the journey, exploring nature as much as possible. At the latest we will be home by the 6th of August. The following weekend I’ll be having a going away party for myself, to try and see as many friends as I can before I’m gone, and the 14th I’ll head out. I’m planning on going north a bit again, through Owatonna, MN, then west from there, toward Washington. This is the plan, anyway.
The fact that I am able to do this — quit my job, pack up my Jeep, and leave for an indefinite amount of time to travel the country, something I think the majority of people in the USA would think irresponsible, or impractical — comes down to two major things. First, and most importantly, I am a Christian, in a real, practical sense. I try each and every day to follow Jesus and the example He left, through the power of His Spirit within me, and though I fail miserably all the time (as we all do), I know that He is there to pick me up when that happens; and I really do want to know just how much He does want to bless me, I want to stretch my faith to bursting, and I can’t really do that living at home for free and working a steady job through the week. That’s just me. The second reason I can, in fact must, do this trip, is this: I cannot bear the thought of being stuck in the same town for decades at a time, not going out and exploring the world and experiencing what it has to offer, and not pursuing my passion. I’m a photographer; I want to create and see beautiful things, to be able to show that to others and bring beauty to their lives; I want to live my life to the fullest, not settle for ease, comfort, “security” (which is a myth, by the way), and consistency. I don’t call that living. Just existing. It just is not enough, definitely not for me as I am right now.
So that’s that. Life keeps moving, the wind keeps blowing. Sometimes it’s really hard, and stuff happens that hurts and burns and leaves scars, and you move on and learn from it all. Maybe my plans will fall apart, and maybe that’ll be a good thing, and maybe it won’t. Either way, I’ll just have to do what I can, and keep trusting God. For now, I’m going to get back to work on the Jeep, and probably relax with a coffee later when I’m finished. Tomorrow night I’m going to see Baby Driver with some friends, and I’m really excited for that. I’m just … blowin’ in the wind. And I think that’s a good thing.
— Joel